*EBOOK* The Art of Mingling: Easy, Fun and Proven Techniques for Mastering Any Room Download Free (EPUB, PDF)
Download *EBOOK* The Art of Mingling: Easy, Fun and Proven Techniques for Mastering Any Room Download Free (EPUB, PDF)...
I got to about chapter 2 where she suggests that novice minglers should start off by practicing mingling with a bunch of "nerds" if they feel shy at first - ie people with low social status who you would never want to be caught talking to otherwise. Well take a wild guess as to what kind of people will want to read this kind of book in the first place. Talk about alienating your readers. For someone who has "mastered' the social graces this shows a complete lack of tact
This is one of those rare times where I felt the book was so inappropriate and poorly written that I ripped it in half and threw it away rather than donating it or even recycling it considering that someone may pick it out and read it. If I could give this book a zero star rating or even a negative star rating I would have. Right in the beginning the author writes to practice mingling on nerds and refers them as the party's lowest common denominator. Is she serious? ANOTHER EXAMPLE WHICH CAN DEMONSTRATE JUST HOW POORLY THIS BOOK IS WRITTEN AND HOW USELESS MOST OF THE ADIVCE IS THIS: the author SUGGESTS TO STEP ON SOMEONES FOOTS TO HURT THEM AS AN EXIT STRATEGY OF THE CONVERSATION. This book is FILLED with useless examples such as this.
Also, much of the book is written from the writers immature, insecure self sense of worth. She give's an abundance of advice written from a bitter and immature point of view. For example, she writes "Oh, I'm sorry, I thought you we're human" and even wrote about paying someone $5.00 to someone drunk to pour a drink on somebody who was very rude and arrogant to you. She also states countless instances of flat out lying rather than teaching the truth of being assertive and honest. One of her exiting techniques is to grab someone you know and pull them up and into a very dull and annoying person just to escape. Who would do that to a friend? I could go on, but do not want to waste anymore time. Please do not buy this book.
Do you suffer from minglephobia, a secret terror of large parties?
If so, then THE ART OF MINGLING--written and read by Jeanne
Martinet--is the book for you . . . you'll learn dozens of field-tested
tricks, tips and lines and maneuvers that will help you in any
I thought I knew a good deal about the subject, but even I
was reminded of some useful things from listening to the CD
version, including these tidbits:
* Your primary goal at any gathering should be enjoyment.
* Pretend to be happy wherever you are. An amazing thing will
happen. You will actually feel that way.
* Practice your mingling skills on the socially challenged; e.g., a party
misfit who appears lost.
* A good question that works as an opening line: How'd you get
here? (Ask with a smile.)
* Never, never use: What do you do for a living? It could be a real
* Offer to help others get food and drink.
* You never have to mingle with a drunk unless you want to. To remove
yourself a simple "excuse me" is fine.
* Avoid political discussions. You're not there to solve the world's problems.
Only one thing bothered me about Martine's book--her belief that it's OK
to lie . . . I think that such a practice should be avoided, if at all possible.
At first I thought the author had some interesting ideas about how to approach "mingling." Later I find that Ms. Martinet has a very superficial way of thinking about socially interacting, something akin to how 'pick-up' artists view approaching girls in a night club (she gives you pickup lines!). Don't trust anyone that tells you to use a pick up line.
I cannot understand as to why this edition has gotten so many negative comments as compared to the 2006 edition. In short Jeanne Martinet in my opinion is a clever and witty writer who has great tips for anyone who wants to learn how to be a master mingler -- notice how I said "learn" and "mingle" : these are not tips for those who already consider themselves good conversationalists or who want to learn how to win lasting friendships. I got over this distinction very quickly, and frankly I feel as though those users who gave Jeanne negative comments have yet to understand this. The whole concept of "telling white lies" does not bother me in the least. In the art of mingling telling a little lie will only catch someone's attention in a non-threatening way. This is not a social disservice or a crime against feminism. You will probably never see the people with which you mingle with again (especially if you did not hit it off with them), and if you happen to hit it off with someone, surely you should be smart enough not to tell any larger lies!
Also for those users who encourage others to just "be themselves", this does not work for most people. I myself often feel overly-cocky in social situations, and feel that because I am fabulous people should want to come talk to me, or eventually will. This is a twisted, narcissistic logic, and never works as I have often employed these tactics at parties and have wound up spending most of my time alone. Jeanne's book has taught me to re-channel my outgoingness in a positive way and has also reminded me to pay more care to those who I am attempting to mingle with - many of her tips are reactionary to people you HAVE to mingle with, and people you don't care for. She doesn't cover it as much, but by all means if there is someone you hit it off with or enjoy their company then good for you! Be yourself! Don't lie! Truly be invested in what they have to say!
If you do not like Jeanne's specific tactics (with which she provides ample examples) then at the very least she teaches you to be comfortable with being equally vulnerable (as most people are at parties) as well as comfortable with taking charge of your own social situation.
I believe that Jeanne deserves many stars for her work. She is quick minded and funny and I can see her tactics working in many social settings for many people. I just don't agree with the negative comments about her work, especially about telling "white lies"... she promises to teach you to be a good mingler, one whose sole purpose is to survive and even have fun in slightly-awkward social situations. If you want to learn to make people like you forever or make true friends and "be yourself", read some other book...although I doubt that tactics of using flattery or white lies in initial contact to win someone's favor will be any different
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